By JanetheWriter 
Three years ago last week, the California Assembly voted to legalize same-sex marriage in the Golden State.  Earlier this week, the JTA reported that on September 4, perhaps to mark this anniversary, Orthodox Jewish and Catholic leaders signed a statement that affirms that affording same-sex unions the status of marriage "dilute[s] the special standing of marriage between a man and a woman."

The signatories "hope that even those outside of our common religious traditions will recognize that we speak from the truth of human nature itself which is consistent with both reason and the moral life."  Although one of the statement's signatories, Rabbi Fabian Schonfeld, chairman of the OU/RCA Joint Committee on Interreligious Affairs, and I share a religious tradition, I don't believe that he speaks from the truth of human nature and I certainly don't believe that that truth is consistent with either reason or with the moral life.

My truth tells me that the sanctity of my parents' 50+-plus-year union is on a par with the much more recent one of Josh Wayser and Richard Schulte, who together are raising five (yes, five) kids in a loving, stable home.

My truth tells me that the marriage between Laura Moskowitz and Robin Shore equals in holiness the one my grandparents had.  My truth tells me, too, that their daughter Mariah, with two loving parents devoted to each other and to building a Jewish home together, is one lucky kid.

My truth tells me that, as Philip Smith wrote in a recent post on Jewcy, "...God might not care... whether you love men or women, as long as you love.  Instead,...I would assume that God would be more concerned with how you move through the world, how you express love, and how you contribute to others."   

And thus, my truth tells me that because of the ways in which Rabbi Victor Appell and his partner Colin move through the world, express love and contribute to others, their union, although not sanctioned by the State of New Jersey, is, nonetheless, holy.  Like Josh and Richard, Laura and Robin, these two loving adults have devoted themselves to each other and to raising two Jewish children.

And lastly this:  My truth tells me that, as with politics, all definitions are local.  If the Orthodox community wishes to define "sacred" -- for the Orthodox community -- that's fine.  If the Catholic community wishes to define "sacred" -- for the Catholic community -- that's fine, too.  However, truths are not laws, and none of us--least of all Josh and Richard, Laura and Robin, Victor and Colin, or the thousands of other loving individuals building sacred, holy unions as same-sex couples--need be restrained in any way by someone else's truth.

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