As a layman in the movement, whose wife chose to join with us almost 16 years ago, and given how many mixed religion families we have in our temples have taken the following as my personal position:

If, as I get to know someone who is active in our conversation and has not taken the step to convert, I will ask them if they have thought about converting. This may be as simple as that,or I have actually said, you have created a Jewish family, are active in our community, is there any reason you have not officially become a Jew?

I have gotten various responses over time. Some have gone on to convert, others have started the conversation with their spouses and families. I have had relieved spouses thank me for asking the question they did not feel brave enough to ask themselves.

I have always phrased the question in terms of welcoming and wanting the person to know he or she is desired as and official member of our people.

The opportunity may only come up once in a while, but I am never shy when it does. So far I have not had one negative reaction. In many cases it seems like no one ever asked them to join us before.

While I have not received my issue of Reform Judaism where this is addressed, as a convert who came to Judaism on her own, I think that Jews need to be more "welcoming" when someone comes forward, and that yes, they SHOULD encourage people. While I am not advocating door-knocking, let us not forget that Jews originally WERE prosthelytizers!

Judaism, and Jews, are still viewed as rather "unfriendly" by non-Jews. Now why do you think that is? It would have meant so much to have someone help me through this process, which was only made difficult because the difficulty getting in to such an insular community.

I am disturbed by Mark's comment. However, it is typical of many "born Jews", who feel that they are the only "real Jews" and that converts have no "right" to a place in Israel.

Let us not forget that, on a whole, born Jews are not only less active than Jews by choice, but they are marrying interfaith, and not raising their children Jewish, at an increasing rate. The fact that, despite babies being born to Jewish parents, recognition of Jews by patrilineal descent, and people converting, that Jews are a SHRINKING population, is indication that his argument has little, if any, merit.

I am also disturbed by Mark's comment, but it is typical of the attitude I have encountered from some Jews since I converted 17 years ago. I think the better question is "Who has a stronger connection to the homeland of the Jewish people - someone who CHOSE to identify themselves with the Jewish people or someone whose Jewish identity is an accident of birth and consists of eating bagels on Sunday morning and attending services two days a year?"

The subject of conversion is one that has become very much the center of discussion in my home at present. My wife and I are looking forward to the birth of our first child next Spring and faith observance -- or denomination subscription -- is important to me. In our household, we are dealing with a rather complex situation, with regard to religious faith; allow me to elaborate...
I was borne of two families who converted -- both in the early part of the 20th century -- from Judaism to variations of Christian faith to protect themselves from persecution. My mother and I, independently, chose to "come back" to the Jewish faith many years ago. If that isn't complicated enough...
My wife was borne of two families whose histories and heritage tell nothing of subscription to the Jewish faith. My wife claims to be agnostic, citing zealotry and individuals who lack freewill as the primary factors keeping her away from organised religious practices. I respect her choices and support her in every way, but am concerned about what is to be my child's spiritual centre.
I do not want to make my child's choices for her/ him (we do not know the sex yet), but I feel a strong desire to raise the child as a Jew. As the child's mother is not Jewish, s/he would have to engage in and complete a proper conversion program in order to live life as a Jew. This is the least of my concerns, considering the choice of religious faith and education for the child will need to come from an agreement between my wife and myself.
I want peace and solidarity in my household, not tension or division. I appreciate that generously educating my wife about my beliefs and convictions will help, but I may still find no satisfaction for my desire to raise my child the way my Jewish heart wishes to.

As to the original question I think we should be guided by Hillel's original statement in favor of proselytizing. "Be among the disciples of Aaron, a lover of peace, a pursuer of peace. Love all your fellow creatures and bring the near to the Torah." (Avot 1:12). I think the concept of "m'karev", bring near, is to invite and draw people in, not push them; note the context of pursuing peace. With that caveat, I all in favor of making the invitation loud and clear.

I believe we should encourage conversion, particularly among seekers who are not actively affiliated with another faith. I live in a small Southern city with an overwhelming Baptist presence from the influence of a recently deceased religio-political evangelical whose adherents would not hesitate to attempt to convert us members of our tiny congregation. I am not suggesting going after his followers, but I think sitting back and hoping people come finding Judaism is no longer the way to go.

I think we should take an active approach. After all, it is no longer a capital crime to solicit converts (which is what led to the "discourage three times" philosophy). I believe outlets such as billboards, seminars and panels introducing Jewish thought and learning and a more public approach will work for us without having to go door to door seeking converts. There are people out there who believe in God but would not identify themselves as belonging to any organized religion. Judaism is a brilliant path to communicating with God, and it's time we encouraged conversion.

I feel this is a very difficult subject, one that requires individual thought. I came to being a Jew by choice on my own, but with the help of a friend. Never was I asked if I would convert, but was made to feel included by all the members of our congregation. I had no religious connection to leave so maybe it was easier for me than someone who is connected to one that they must leave. For years before I made it formal most people I met thought I was Jewish. Even other Jews thought I was Jewish and on the night of my formal convertion one of the congregants said "I thought you were going to the classes to help your wife." Having said all that I feel we should help all that are interested but since I do not want people trying to convert me I think we should not actively try to convert them.

Doris, you are Jewish, period. There's no need for you to explain to others.

It does sadden me to hear about your and Karin's difficulties with acceptance, especially since I have been so fortunate to be surrounded by a Jewish community that has not only expressed acceptance of my Jewish identity, but had made me feel valued as well.

I was reminded of an article I read last summer about converts in midieval Europe-I was surprised to learn that there was a written record of such creatures. But the history shows they often had a tough row to hoe even among their fellow Jews, and even then their experiences of acceptance were varied. Here's the article (it's a little long, and not exactly light reading, but I was captivated anyway):
http://www.hartman.org.il/Focus_View_Eng.asp?Article_Id=157

Ruth B. - Thank you for your simple acceptance statement.

I did read the article link and then went on to read another at that site "Sharing Jewish Space"

http://www.hartman.org.il/Focus_View_Eng.asp?Article_Id=146

The last half of the article has provoking thoughts on the current situation. It too is a long read......

When I recently went to Israel for the first time and learned of the difficulties for Reform Jews. I was very saddened but also encouraged by the small forward steps that have been achieved. But I came home feeling I would not be welcomed to live there and would always be considered an outsider and unworthy.

I also have periodically have been checking the JewsByChoice site and do see a huge variety of experiences.

So I still ask, the question 'why' about this new topic, and are we putting the cart before the horse in education/changing attitudes within our ranks toward inviting converts. Is this just an American issue?

We must extend welcome to all...or we risk alienating and hurting people. I was raised Jewish. My mother is from Cuba and partly Sephardic and underwent formal conversion in her teens to seal the deal. I was blessed with a great adoptive father who is Jewish, but my biological father was not. I never gave my racial background much of a thought until I was dumped by a Jewish fiance over his family's concerns that my mother's Reform conversion didn't make me sufficiently Jewish and would ensure that any children could not go to Israel under the Law of Return.
To say this attitude devastated me would be an understatement. I can change a lot of things, but not DNA. I totally did not expect it because I had grown up Jewish, with Jewish parents, involved in our Temple. My ex-fiance was totally secular and had gone to temple once, because I dragged him there...but he was ethnically Jewish and wanted to move to Israel someday.
After my experience, I did not attend Temple for many years. I wandered spiritually, trying to make myself fit in any non-Jewish setting I could....churches, ashrams, sanghas. Anywhere that my race would not be an issue. I intermarried and had a child. I never wanted her to be made to feel less than because of her DNA, so I felt ambivalent about her interest in Judaism. I missed Temple with all my heart but was afraid to return.
Finally, after years of hurt and fear of rejection, we are back in temple. And we are blessed by a welcoming congregation. My daughter (who is obviously not white)does deal with some kids at school telling her she is obviously not a "real Jew"...but she is dealing with it.
Reform Judaism is ethical, spiritual and beautiful. It has so much to offer...a really universal message of tolerance, faith and human dignity. But we do need to deal with the remnants of some ugly tribal attitudes about "other" that make it hard for converts and their children to feel 100% welcome. Reaching out to the community at large is a great way to signal that Jews by choice are not just tolerated, but wanted.

Thanks, Erin, for making the distinction for me between US and Canadian positions regarding patrilineal descent. I had missed the subtlety of spelling in organised.

But in my interfaces with Canadian Reform Jews, I've gotten the impression that there is some sensitivity to how we use the word American -- they want us to say North American to be sure they are included -- so it strikes me that using United States or U.S. is a more appropriate way to make the distinction between north and south of the border.

I like what Phil said about not being picky, given how small a population we are. And I agree that prosyletizing is generally creepy...but I definitely do distinguish between prosyletizing (like going door to door or being invasive & pushy trying to convert people)and outreach (like inviting people to services and actively welcoming people who have an interest in learning about Judaism).

It seems like a week doesn't go by without some article or another bemoaning the low birthrates (with the exception of the ultra-Orthodox)in the Jewish community and encouraging young Jews not to intermarry and to breed more. This is accompanied by a lot of hand-wringing about the future of the Jewish people. As if the only real way to get more Jews is to breed them. Which begs the question: Do we want more Jews attending temple and participating irrespective of DNA, or do we want more people who are ethnically Jewish?

I find it absolutely creepy and offensive when the whole "who is a real Jew" debate gets going. On many levels. Because we do discriminate based on DNA. No getting around it...otherwise why do a formal conversion for a newborn adopted by a Jewish couple? That sends the message that adopted children are not as "real" to the couple as a biological child would be. There should be no additional step to bring in an adopted child...by virtue of the adoption, they are a full member of the family and therefore Jewish like their parents...unless they are being categorized as somehow "other" because of their race.

Another example...noone is arguing that someone ethnically Jewish is not fully Jewish if they have never set foot in a temple or synagogue and have received zero Jewish education. Why? I guess there is something magical about their DNA. Meanwhile, those with only one Jewish parent have to have parents who can afford a temple membership and have to jump through every hoop and be a Torah scholar in order to qualify...and might still fall short of the mark in the eyes of Orthodox Jews if the Jewish parent was Dad instead of Mom. It is the one thing that I still struggle to reconcile, because it is racist and indefensible.

If we want to live up to an inclusive message and we want to appeal to universal principles we can not divide humanity into a special, better "chosen" people and (by default)a lesser loved people apparently not chosen to be special by God. That paints a picture of a God unworthy of our devotion and respect. If all we are about is being cliquey and xenophobic, then why should we bother to preserve Judaism? Or, do we get that the "chosen people" is an ancient tribal notion that had its use in its time, but does not give us the right to treat non-ethnic Jews as second class citizens in 2008? If we are really an ethical people, can't we do better than this?

This discussion has gone far afield from the original question -- which was in effect Shall we be active or re-active in approaching people already in our midst about formally affirming their connection with us and with God as viewed thrugh a Jewish prism.

But it is absurd to suggest that a non-Jew (by his or her own definition) may unilaterally assert "I am now a Jew" and be communally accepted as such.

Remember that Hillel's succinct statement of what Judaism is all about was followed by Go and study. And when we study, we learn that God makes special demands on those who would be Jewish, while leaving the door to the World to Come open to the righteous of all nations (righteous defined here in terms of the Noahide laws).

Phil and Laura P may be concerned about what a small people we are. But our job is not to recruit "members." Our job is to make and serve and be Jews. If we erase quality from the equation in the interest of quantity, as Hillel again said, What are we?

Now there are three threads here --
1. The originally posed question -- do we ask the non-Jews in our midst to become Jews, or do we wait for them to ask us.(In neither of these alternatives is there even a hint of advocacy for knock-on-doors proselytizing.)
2. The "embrace everybody with open arms" which seemed to me to be what Phil was advocating, and was the point with which i was disagreeing.
3. The digression from the originally posed question, to discuss how we welcome the Jews-by-choice in our midst. The "policy" of the movement is very clear on this, with one major exception (see below) -- but neither the movement nor any of its congregations, nor any of the members of those congregations can legislate or enforce individual behavior, nor control social insensitivity whether by those born into Judaism or those who found it later.

What's the policy of the movement? The Jew-by-choice is a Jew. Simple as that.

The unresolved issue? Is it appropriate, and if so, under what circumstances. to call attention to the prior status of the JBC?

The tradition says No. Thus I remember how outraged some people were when, at a Union Biennial, in celebration of an anniversary of the Outreach program, all those who had chosen Judaism were called to the bimah at Shabbat services for an aliyah to the Torah -- outraged because attention should not have been called to their (former) status.

And I remember equally vividly how some 200 people, many with tears of joy in their eyes, accepted the invitation.

It's been my experience that a significant number of those who have chosen Judaism want their former status to be known -- look at what people say about themselves here on the blog.

But they, and those who prefer that their former status be forgotten, and those who were born into Judaism, all have to remember that being born into Judaism doesn't automatically confer menshlichkeit (the quality of behaving properly).

So to those who feel they have not been welcomed properly, I can say I'm sorry that's been the case, but I can't apologize for somebody else's misconduct. And I can also say that there are also born Jews who have felt spurned or not properly welcomed in some of our congregations. (When I was saying Kaddish for my father, I went almost every Friday night to the same congregation -- and in the course of those eleven months, other than the rabbi and the rebbetzin, no one ever greeted me or made me feel welcome!)

And to go back to the original question -- should we invite conversion of the non-Jews who are already in our midst, or shall we wait for them to raise the question? -- it seems clear that the reason the question comes up at all is again a matter of menshlichkeit -- the fear that asking the question might be interpreted as invalidating the existing status of the "candidate."

Scott of Massachusetts deals excellently with that issue in the second comment on this thread. Let's all go back and read it, and learn from it.

The taboo against proselytizing stems from a respect for other religions, not from any concern over "quality". If a potential convert approaches us, he is driven by an inward spark that connects him to Judaism. If someone proposes going to non-Jews and pressuring them to convert, I have to wonder why.

Judaism does not believe in "perfecting" others by getting them to convert. It teaches that it is possible to be righteous regardless of what faith you belong to. Let the non-Jew decide for himself which path to righteousness (conversion or the Noachide laws) is best for him.

I also find the concerns over low synagogue attendance misplaced. If the Jews in the area aren't joining your synagogue, maybe you should ask them why. Converting under the guidance of a rabbi who can't get his own community to show up is not an attractive offer.

I agree very much with what Brian in Bexley said. The truth is that if Judaism (e.g., Reform or Conservative) continues to rely upon genetic fallout to fill its ranks, it will die! The ultra Orthodox, with their habit of having many children, seem intent on replenishing the future ranks of Judaism,

If the more liberal/less judgmental branches of Judaism want to replenish their ranks, then they need to embrace those who are not born Jewish but who, nonetheless, love this religion and its people. For more than 30 years I loved Jews and their history, ethics, and accomplishments. I was an Evangelical Christian but unhappy.

Finally I realized that I had a Jewish soul and needed to convert. I wasn't marrying anyone Jewish and my children are grown so I don't have any "ulterior" motives for converting -- just love of Jews and Judaism. Judaism needs to embrace people such as myself who are willing to undergo its classes and learn about it and pay whatever they must to belong.

Does anyone need FEWER friends? Do Jews? I say embrace everyone who is willing to go through the classes and the mikveh and the abbreviated brit milah. Judaism in its thousands of years of history has embraced many outsiders who loved its people -- examples are rife in our Bible, Ruth most prominently.

I for one can say to the Jews in my day as did Ruth to the Jews in hers, that your people are mine and your G-d is my G-d.

I love Judaism (at least liberal Judaism, I admit I have no first-hand knowledge of other branches since I converted under the auspices of Reform) because of the points made by Joseph and others.
Joseph put it perfectly by saying that "Judaism teaches that it is possible to be righteous, regardless of what faith you belong to." Bravo!!
Coming from a background of Evangelical Christianity, such cerebral open-mindedness is what drew me to Judaism. The type of Christianity I was involved with taught that there was only ONE way to G-d and all other ways were doomed to hell (the latter a concept that Judaism, refreshingly, as little to say about).
But Joe, I have to admit I disagree with you in regard to your notation that the "taboo against proslytizing stems from a respect for other religions." Um, no, not really. It stems from a respect for self preservation! Jews were proslytizing at some points in history until it was made clear that doing so would amount to their heads on a platter! There were several points in history in which it was made clear that proslytes and the Jews who might have encouraged or helped them to consider becoming Jews were to be executed. Quite the damper on reaching out, I would say.

Still, Judaism survived, as it always does and always will. Yet another reason why I love this, the original way of worshipping G-d.

This topic has been going on for over 2 years. Ironically I found in the URJ Eilu V'eilu Archives, starting with December 11, 2006, Vol 10, week 1, opening statements by Rabbi Mandelburg and Rabbi Einstein. The series (weeks) makes for fascinating reading and I would encourage all to check it out.

http://urj.org/torah/ten/eilu/archives/

Sharon, in Second Temple times they had a thing called called a 'ger toshav', which means something like resident stranger. A 'ger toshav' I think just had commit to obey the seven laws of the 'sons of Noah'--basic ethical laws plus not doing idolatry--and then they were to have full status under the law in ancient Israel, just as a native would. Something like a 'green card' vs citizenship.

It's more complicated than that, and I'd have to look it up. But the point is that there is precedent for what you are saying.

I like your idea.

Phil, there seem to be several intertwined strands in your last comment, and many of them don't jibe with my undertanding of either the policies of the state of Israel or the positions of the Orthodox community.

The Orthodox community would consider you Jewish as the son of a Jewish mother. Were you not the son of a Jewish mother, their yardstick would be conversion according to Halachah. Factionalism within the Orthodox community might create a problem where one faction doesn't accept the halachic credentials of another faction -- but that's not our issue as American Reform Jews.

The state of Israel would take no position whatsoever on your Reform upbringing. You would be eligible to take up residence under the terms of the Law of Return, nor would your upbringing be a bar to citizenship.

As the son of a Jewish mother, your status should not be questioned were you to want to marry in Israel -- which is not to say that someone in authority might not hassle you to prove your religious bona fides. Given that Israelis do not enjoy the separation of religion and state, it's important that those of us who care about those issues support the Israel Movement for Progressive Judaism and the Israel Religious Action Center. When I say "support," I'm not just talking about moral support -- I'm talking about sending money.

I'm not sure I follow your comments on proving we're Jewish enough, followed by the question, Who cares? As Reform Jews, we don't have the concept of being Jewish enough -- but since it may be an issue in Israel where life cycle events are involved, we should all care.

The other issue that's been put on the table here -- a digression from the original question discussed by Rabbis Yoffie, Einstein, and Mandelberg, on inviting the conversion of folks who are already participating in our communities -- is the question of making the person who has taken that step feel welcome.
Clearly some of the people who have commented here (and I'm sure there are people who haven't commented but who feel the same way) do not feel that they are fully accepted as Jews by some of their fellow-congregants.

Well, after we've said Shame on you to those who are not living up to Jewish standards of hospitality and welcome -- what next? As I said a week ago, we have no way to enforce menshlichkeit, and it's not a genetic trait in the DNA of all Jews, however they came to their Jewishness.

One What Next might be to organize (or re-organize) Outreach committees in our congregations, so we program our welcome activities instead of leaving it to chance. Insofar as an Outreach committee reaches out to those who have not taken the step of affirming Judaism for themselves -- we're acting along the lines of Rabbi Yoffie's 2005 Biennial suggestions. But insofar as the committee s reaching out to those who have taken the step -- we walk the tightrope between welcome and emphasizing an otherness that is precisely what we don't want to emphasize.

Are we damned if we do and damned if we don't?

Phil, I know the article to which you refer--here it is:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/02/magazine/02jewishness-t.html

The State of Israel would have no problem with any Reform-proof of Jewish identity regarding the Law of Return--ie, you could make aliyah to become a citizen of Israel based on non-orthodox documents of Jewish identity.

The issue is with the Rabbinate, which would come into play if you needed to get married or buried in Israel.

This is one of the reasons why I would take a relatively more conservative (small-c) approach to encouraging conversion. We need to be absolutely transparent about what obstacles a potential ger tzedek might encounter should they (or, if female, their progeny) join up and decide to make aliyah.

Apologies to Larry for the continued digression from the original topic...but I have to point out that Laura's statement you can be a Reform Jew in good standing in the US and be totally ineligible to move to Israel is inaccurate. Reform and Conservative conversions done outside of Israel are recognized under the Law of Return--so you can move to Israel. It's just that the state-supported Rabbinate there will not recognize you Jewish, just as they won't recognize the thousands of patrilineal Russian olim. It's a problem, to which Laura's painful personal history can attest.

A hypothetical: say I'm blessed with a daughter, and am somehow successful in raising her with a strong Jewish identity into a knowledgeable and engaged young adult Jew. Let's say she goes away to college and falls in love with a nice young Modern Orthodox boy named Cohen. She's even willing to adopt his family's version of halachic living and jump through their hoops to "convert"--but it won't matter. That tradition holds that Cohenim can't marry converts.....

It's a little far-fetched. But as a giyoret it does weigh even on my fully-and-enthusiastically-Jewishly-committed conscience.

Now, I am Jewish not because it is easy, but because I am compelled from deep in my gut and soul. I feel I could not deny this part of my identity any more than I could deny or change being heterosexual. If we "invite" conversion, I think we had better be absolutely certain that they have a fire in their belly to be Jewish, and strengthen them to stand up to the Ezras among us who hold to a narrow definition of Jewishness. If we are to "invite", it needs to be with full disclosure: you are joining a beautiful gem of a people and a deep and thoughtful religion, but they have some heavy baggage--be prepared to help carry it.

BTW, Thanks for the article Ruth. That's the one.

Jill, as you probably are aware, traditionally Jews are required to treat converts at full Jews, and in fact normally are not to even mention that they are converted, so that no distinction is made. Of course, Reform Jews also are supposed to treat converts as full Jews.

So if anybody is not being a "real" Jew, it is those people born to Jewish parents who discriminate in any way against converts. They are violating our traditions, not you. I hope this discrimination is a rare occurrence, but perhaps some of the those posting here can tell us how rare or common this is, from personal experience.

For irony, consider -

Most Jews-by-birth in Israel are not very observant and would probably refuse to pursue an Orthodox conversion if they had to, especially if they had to agree to observe Orthodox custom.

The bible is full of conversion stories of various sorts, but now it is treated by Orthodox authorities as only legitimate through them.

Listen. Maybe I'm playing devil's advocate here, but try this on. I do not mean to offend anyone by what I'm about to say, but it's time to tell it like it is.

If you converted, shut up. right? I mean I can't help but wonder if some of you converts bring it on yourself. Do you have to tell everyone you meet that you "converted"? You can't have it both ways, and I say that with all repect.

I'm sensing some paranoya here. You brag about how you converted, then get upset when people question your choice, and say that you're being discriminated against. It's almost laughable.

If you want to be considered a Jew, then be one! It's not necessary for you to explain over and over again. You're a Jew, that's it. Enough said.

Jill,
Again, no need to take offense to what I said. If you scroll up and read my previous posts, you would see that I have no problem with converts, and actually feel that us born Jews should do more to welcome you all within reason.

However, I'm seeing a pattern here. I have a feeling the issue is with you Jill, not the people at your temple who you think are "un-welcoming". That's my point.

What are people doing to you to make you think you aren't welcome?

Also I'd like to add, I've asked converts why they've chosen Judaism after they finish telling a group of people that they were born something else, and they get all flustered.

I'm just basing my opinion on personal experience. Again, no need for offense.

Hi,
As a Jew-by-choice I find this topic interesting. I'd like to put something out there as food for thoughts.

Torah, and by greater extension, Judaism is a way in which to connect to G-d. But it's not like any other 'religion'. As we all know, logic dictates that Jews should not exist today. Yet, here we are. Why? Because the Jewish/Torah way of connecting with G-d is complete. To expand, while other religions/faiths have ways to connect with G-d, it is not a total connection. Pieces are missing. But not with Judaism. Why? Because Torah contains ALL the ways in which to connect with the Divine. The only disagreement is whether or not we have to 'observe' all those ways. As a Reform Jew with a 'mystical bent', i'd like to propose that the 613 mitzvot are designed to help us correct deficiencies in our characters. However, unlike the orthodox viewpoint, some aspects of our characters are already 'fine', and therefore we don't need to perform certain mitzvot anymore. So we can explore and try different mitzvot to see which ones resonate with us. If they do, i suggest it's because that particular miztvot connects that part of our souls that needs 'some work' in order to connect that part of our soul with G-d.

So what does this have to do with conversion? Simple, if Judaism/Torah has the means in which to have a total connection to G-d, why wouldn't we want ALL people to share in that total connection?

~ Chaim

I might be very lucky,then:I was born from a Jewish father and a Catholic mother and had never ANY sort of connection to Judaism;but,when I spoke to Orthodox jews about the possibility of converting,they were always incouraging me,and never gave me the cold shoulder.
Now,this can be for 3 reasons:
1) I'm lucky
2) My father is Jewish,so they might want to have me "back".
3) Those Orthodox guys I spoke to,were only Chabad,and,as far as I know,they are frendlier than other Orthodox jews.
I really don't know the right answer....

I believe that conversion to Judaism is in many respects like an adoption - Israel becomes your home and the prophets your ancestors - in this respect conversion in no way diminishes Jewish claims to Israel.

I also believe very strongly that reaching out to non-jews would actually help to destroy the menace of anti-semitism.
Why?
Because many people still believe that Jews are a 'race', and, quite obviously, one can't 'convert' to a race. Once people realise that anybody, of any race can be Jewish, it will help to destroy this aspect of anti-semitism.

At the same time, this will hopefully also destroy the arguments of those who equate Zionism with Racism.

Jews need to open the communities and embrace converts. I have met so many people who are facinated by Judaism but don't feel that they can make the next step.

We are priviliged in our beautiful faith - should we not make it easier for others to share in it?

Randall Wirth - good luck with your future study, I for one welcome you for taking your first step towards the Jewish community!!!