Joyful Judaism in Cheshvan
November 11, 2008
Shabbat
(6 comments)
By Marge Eiseman
I just realized that I offered to teach "Joyful Judaism", my own sometimes rambling take on why I love being Jewish, during the month that is often called "bitter" (mar Cheshvan). What an interesting irony - the month is called bitter because there are no special holidays. Since it follows the holiday-laden month of Tishrei, I actually greet Cheshvan each year with relief and joy. Finally, Shabbat can rise to take its place again as the crown of the week.
So as I focused my thoughts on what to teach, given the range of possibilities (contemporary Jewish music, the new Mishkan T'fillah prayerbook, the amazing book I'm currently reading, Witnesses to the One: The Spiritual History of the Sh'ma by Rabbi Joseph Meszler, Jewish cooking, Storahtelling, etc.), I kept heading to teach things connected with Shabbat that I love.
The first week, we braided dough and baked Challah, and hung out in the kitchen to share the warm, sweet crust with butter and talk about the beauty of Jewish food and memory. We also listened to "Gesher" the self-titled CD from the Nashville group. Since there was only one student, it was more of a conversation than a class. But she promised to come back, and the next week, there were four of us.
The next session, I realized that I wanted to focus on the blessings of Shabbat, but not the ones relating to ritual objects or food. No, I went after "Eshet Chayil" and "Birchot haMishpachah" - for former is also called "A Woman of Valor", and is the ode from Proverbs that a husband recites to his wife, extolling her virtues, and the latter is the blessing that parents bestow on their children at the beginning of the Sabbath meal, asking that they be like our ancestors and receive the Priestly Benediction. It occurred to me, as I faced my divorced and separated friends and then thought about my never married or childless friends, that these were rather exclusionary prayers.
We experimented with reading Danny Siegel's poem, "In Loco Eshes Chayil", and it was better, expressing the appreciation of the beloved for the interpersonal support, rather than the "work of her hands". But still, the instruction at the top of the page reads, "Husband embraces and kisses wife, then takes her hand and recites:, and that sets this firmly back in the realm of "only married people get this blessing".
Doesn't everyone deserve to be welcomed to the Sabbath table and be blessed for their friendship and contribution to the community? How can we accept the exclusion of anyone at our table, and make them bystanders to the intimate exchange of blessing words flowing around the table? It makes me acutely uncomfortable. So we're going to fix it, and that's what I find so joyful about Judaism the way I live it. At our next session, we'll be writing our own Blessing of Welcome to our Shabbat Table, to be shared by everyone. We'll test it out - tweak if necessary - and report back soon.
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Thanksgiving, one of the favorite and most meaningful holidays for American Jews, falls in the the lunar calendar month of Cheshvan. This holiday seems custom made for American Jews. It is a joyous event were we gather with family and friends of all faiths to praise the Lord and give thanks for all our blessings and to share what is often the finest meal of the year. The traditional turkey dinner with corn bread dressing, cranberry sauce, potatoes, yams, green bean casserole, and pies is perfectly kosher and American. It is always on Thursday, so our Orthodox friends can participate. Thanksgiving also celebrates the friendship between the races and cultures, as it was the tolerance, assistance and friendship of the Indian neighbors which made survival possible for the Pilgrims in their first colonizing years in New England. The Pilgrims studied with Dutch Jews before coming to the New World and centered their religious lives on the Old Testament, seeking to establish a commonwealth based on our bible. Today, the prayers we offer at the Thanksgiving table are classic Reform Jewish prayers of thanks, said in our own language so that everyone, regardless of the church, synagogue or temple to which they belong, can join in. And all the sports fans can top off the celebration by enjoying a little football on TV. How great is that?
Also, Veterans Day falls in Cheshvan. This is another holiday which cuts across race, religion and national origin for all American to join in honoring all men and women who have served under our colors.