When I work with Bar/Bat Mitzvah students on their D'vrei Torah, I often ask a parent to sit in. I find that the students are often challenged by the complexity of the ideas we are discussing. It can be hard to think and take notes at the same time, so I ask the parent to be a silent note keeper. Of course, it doesn't always work out that way. Sometimes, we wind up having a three way discussion. And occasionally, there is a parent who is so aggressive that I have to tell him, "Let's let your son write this one. You can come back and give your own D'var Torah next year".

But last week was a first. I have a student who is writing out Behar, the Torah portion that describes the Sabbatical year. My student decided that the Sabbatical year was a way of reminding us about Shabbat, and he began talking about his own feelings about Shabbat. Suddenly, he stopped, and he said to his father, "Wait a second, Dad! We don't keep Shabbat. We play sports and sometimes you work!"  The two of them turned red.  How could the boy write a D'var Torah about Shabbat when the he perceives his family as not keeping Shabbat?  The three of us talked for a while about what Shabbat meant to them, and we decided that ultimately, sports might be OK. The father, a busy physician who is recently divorced, told me that more than anything else, what Shabbat means to him is spending time with his children.

Friday morning, my student sent me a draft that said this:
What about Shabbat in our own lives? I spend my Friday nights and Saturdays, on Shabbat, hanging with my friends, playing sports, and going to the synagogue. This allows me a break from my busy week of school, and Hebrew school and gives me a chance to rest and rejuvenate as well. And by going to the synagogue and gives me a chance to reflect on my religion and to think about God and my purpose in the world.

...The two of them came to services on Friday, and the father told me, "This D'var Torah has changed me. I'm not working tomorrow. I'm spending the day with my kids."

More that Israel has kept Shabbat, Shabbat has kept Israel.

- Art Grand
Chair of Joint Commission on Worship, Music & Religious Living
President of URJ Pacific Central West Council